Partner of a Pilot
The Candid Diary of an Airline Pilot’s Girlfriend

Night Shifts are bad for relationships

The nights have taken their toll on Bf and I. He is so tired that he’s cranky and snappy and intolerant. I am feeling like crap because I’m sore and full of medication that makes me feel like I have chronic fatigue syndrome, and that I am permanently tipsy. NOT NICE.

We are off to visit my parents holiday home tomorrow, and I had to phone to arrange a green card and travel insurance. I also had to call Eurotunnel to get our booking reference again as I had accidentally deleted the email. Then I got a worried call from my friend with the psychotic ex-fiance telling me that the situation had worsened, and that she needed to get a solicitor on the case YESTERDAY!

My mum is practice manager for a firm of solicitors, and I was able to email to get the family law partner on the case immediately, but during the 30 minutes that I had to sort these things out, the children made some noise. It’s a pain that life has to go on when the kids are off school, but I still have stuff that I need to do when they’re off and Bf is on nights that require me to be in the house! They were not making a lot of noise to be honest, as the boys knew they had to be quiet, and were trying their best to amuse baby as she was getting whiny. I kept plying them with food and drinks; and to be honest-our own builders were making far more noise than they were.

Bf stormed downstairs with a face like thunder and shouted at me and the boys, told us that we were inconsiderate and went off like a machine gun. It was complete overkill-he basically just picked an argument, and rather than appreciate that he was just tired and frustrated and not reacting normally-I took the bait and argued back.  I ended up in tears, because he accused me of being unloving and uncaring

We were pretty much on our way out for our day trip to the maze any way, and I only had to make up the packed lunches, and we would have been out of his hair for the day completely!

Luckily, Bf calmed down, realised he was being an arse and apologised; and I did too. I can never stay mad at him when he apologises. I know some people use an apology to keep the ‘upper hand’ for days, but I just think life’s too short-and you have to appreciate someone when they hold their hands up to their errors and apologise-as it’s hard to admit you’re wrong when you’re fired up!  We hugged and kissed and made up before I took the kids out for the day.

I hate it when he’s on nights. Especially at the moment; because with the way I am feeling, my tolerance threshold is at zero tolerance. I am literally at the ‘elastic limit’, and anyone who treads on my toes, causes me to snap and either gets floods of tears or an angry, razor-sharp-tongued piece of my mind! It is just not like me; I am normally able to outwardly project a very pragmatic, rational and diplomatic response to stressful situations even when I feel emotional about them.

THANK GOODNESS we have a few weeks off together. Lord knows-we need it!


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