Partner of a Pilot
The Candid Diary of an Airline Pilot’s Girlfriend

Keeping it fresh!


I was reading a discussion thread in a pilot wife forum today about women’s tips to restore a stale relationship. It’s not a problem that Bf and I have luckily, but I’m all for hearing advice from women who have made successful marriages for many years. Some of these women have been happily married for over 20 years.

I felt so sorry for the lady who initiated the discussion, and a few of the others in the group actually. They are stuck in relationships where their pilots act cold and withdrawn from their wives and children. I could not imagine Bf being withdrawn from us. These women obviously still love their husbands very much and cannot consider walking away.

One lady had some really constructive advice, which was to make sure that you plan ‘date nights’. Before you have children, it’s so easy to make time out to have fun care-free moments. Having children changes the whole dynamic of the relationship. You are tied to your home and a routine. I cannot just up and leave for a few days on a trip with Bf without major planning for the boys school drops/collections and ensuring that my mum is free to come and stay after she leaves work.

We cannot go for a night out without arranging and paying for a babysitter. We have no family close by, so it’s not as though we can press upon relations to help out without them going out of their way to do it.  It’s easy to get sucked into a life of nights in with the computer or TV for company…

Bf gets especially frustrated, because a great deal of his time off is mid-week, when school is on. This means that we are restricted to having to be around to do the school run at 9 and 3. Not great if you want to go and DO something for the day.  I really relate to what was being said, because we arrange nights out, and I have been on a few trips. It is a major pain in the backside to organise it all and it can cost a packet, but it’s SO WORTH the effort to go out and still be a couple in love.

I feel inspired to organise another ‘date night’; it’s been too long! I think I’m going to surprise him 🙂 

What do you do to keep it fresh?

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One Response to “Keeping it fresh!”

  1. Heya, I am 19 and my 19 year old bf has just got into British Airways. He is away doing the initial training in Southampton (the far side of the UK from me) I put up with him being away in the USA for 5 months but am really struggling now, particularly plans of a meetup have fallen through and he really seems so involved in his work and I am constantly sidelined. I know he loves his flying, but it is so hard when all my friends are university students loving life. Any advice to get through to him… Luc xxx


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